Monday, October 01, 2007

I had a friend pass away this past week. His name is Greg, and Ryan and I knew him from church here in NC. His dad is our pastor. He died in a fire on Wednesday night. I just got back from the funeral. I've been to a few funerals, but they've all been grandparents. In a way you "expect" those, but this is someone who is my age. How can you prepare for something like that? This was the hardest funeral that I've been to. There has been a lot of tears shed from everyone. I remember at my grandma's funeral, my dad and I were at the casket together and he said, "This is normal. Going to your parent's funeral. It's expected. What's not normal is if I lost one of you." That's one of the hardest things about this. This parents, Chris and Tish. They have been through so much in thier lives. It sometimes seems like a black cloud is following them around at all times. But I have never met people so focused on God and His direction for thier lives. Each tragedy they have dealt with while focused on Christ. And they are so open about thier lives and what they've gone through. We always joke that they are our "North Carolina parents" since we don't have family here. And when we have children they are our designated "North Carolina Grandparents". They are always sending us home with food when we go to their house. It's just hard to see them suffering through another thing. Greg was going through a rough time in his life and he cut out a lot of friends during this period, so Ryan and I haven't talked to him in awhile. In a way for me that is good, because the memories I have were of the good, funny, sober Greg. But as much as he was recently going through, there is no doubt in my mind that he is in Heaven with Christ right now. He knew Christ, and followed Him, but was just in a rough patch of his walk. Greg was passionate about the teens at our church, but once he started drinking, he had to stop leading youth group. Since that time Ryan and I have been helping with the teens. We were really concerned about them because they loved Greg a lot. The last time we met with the teens we were talking about things they wanted to do. One of those was to do something for Greg in this difficult time. They did take is death hard, and it was hard to see them hurting so much. Greg wanted the teens to see the mistakes he had made in the past and how you can overcome them, but unfortunately he slipped back into that lifestyle. Ryan was a pallbearer, which was truely an honor. When Chris had asked him he said something along the lines of, "I know you and Greg weren't really good friends yet, but I would've liked you to have been." They had a slide show at the end of the funeral with pictures of Greg. There was a picture from last Christmas with me, Ryan, Greg, and his wife, Danielle. It was the only picture in that slideshow that didn't have family in it, so again, we were honored to be apart of the "family". My head hurts from crying and my eyes are tired. On Saturday we went to Chris and Tish's house to spend some time with them. That was hard because you are always concerned about "what do I say", etc. I knew we needed to go. Tish does better surrounded by people and we know it would mean a lot if we went. So we pushed our stupid selfish reasons aside and visited them. On Sunday they had the visitation. It was a closed casket due to the fire but there were pictures all over of Greg, showing of his personality. Today was the funeral, then grave site service, and then a lunch at the church. Again, it was so hard to see the family...parents, wife, siblings. I was hurting but couldn't even image what they were going through. I am grateful for my family, my heath (physical and mental), my friends, my church, my job, my house, my food, the clothes on my back. This was a good reminder of the things I have and how it can be gone in a heartbeat so don't take it for granted. I am thankful that Greg knew Christ. His life isn't over. He's probably having a party with Jesus right now, filling up the room like he always did. You will be missed, Greg, but we will see you again someday. I'll never forget your chinchilla impression.

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